Musings of a Dreamer

Hey. Was musing…

There is something about life that is… what’s the word?… eerie. It is alive. It is inside you. It can die. And still be inside you. It can pass you by. And still be inside you.

I have this recurring horrible dream. In this dream that has no form, there is a certain nameless terror that I am fighting. It is choking me, drowning me, sitting so heavy on my chest that I cannot breathe. I fight and fight, and claw my way out of the dream, breathing heavily. And when I wake up, I know that my horror was me. The me I know that I will become if I continue to sleep my life away. The dead me that would simply exist, a shell of who I am, who I am meant to be.

I am scared of myself. I dream so much that I forget to live. Then live so much that I forget to dream.

I mean, do look at my blog for example and appreciate how choked up it is with all the thousands of articles I’ve been bombarding it with since it’s deflowering last year… #rolling my eyes.

Hmmm…

If you are like me (and I know we are so, so many in this seductively deceptive life) know this: it isn’t time to wake up. The time for that is long past and we are still here, dreaming. Why? Here’s the answer to that- we hold a gift that many who scorn us don’t realize.

Dreaming is our strength. And when we stop dreaming, we stop living.

Our dreams are our reality, our connection to true living. When I stop dreaming, I get nightmares where I fight myself. When I dream about the amazing things I can do, I actually do them. My entire being comes alive, I am a success, achieving and more importantly, I am real.  Until I once again stop dreaming. Then reality disappears. I become gossamer thin shell, a ghost even; light as air and with as much substance.

I am scared of losing myself in a world where there are no dreams. And I worry that I will one day give in to the temptation to simply shut my eyes and roll over, sleeping until I forget to think, forget to dream.

I know I’m just one tiny person in about 7 billion, and I don’t really matter to you, but you matter to me. It is much too easy to give up and sink into depression if you are a dreamer; the world isn’t very kind to non-realists. Saying that you are not the only one doesn’t really help much sometimes; you probably already knew. More than wanting you to live, I want you to feel alive. I don’t want you to know that you are not alone; I want you to fight the good fight even if you feel that you are the only one left and the world is beating down hard upon your shoulders. So I’m going to say this to you instead -

LIVE YOUR DREAM.